Just let that sink in.
When I was on my mission, I became known as, what a lot of people called, "That Girl." I was "That Girl" who bore her testimony every fast Sunday since Primary days. I was "That Girl" who knew all the answers during the Primary lessons. I was "That Girl" who loved to go to Seminary, and, lo and behold, I knew all the answers there, too! I was "That Girl" who read her scriptures, and loved analyzing them, and knew all the stories, and understood doctrine. I was "That Girl" who gave a million and one devotionals, (all voluntary, by the way) and lessons, and whatnots. I was "That Girl" who never really questioned anything that was told to me.
I was "That Girl." That girl who never had a reason to question anything. I was "That Girl." That girl who never had any real trials. Oh ya, sure, there were those ridiculous moments when I thought I was ugly, or didn't have friends, or had a hard time during school. But, none of those ever made me second guess things or doubt things.
I had it good. There was no reason to. I just kind of naturally "knew."
I've been thinking a lot. I think more than I speak nowadays. Since everything has happened, I've been REALLY thinking about "The Eternal Plan of Happiness." How families can be together forever, being married with the right authority. How death isn't the end, but just another step in the grand spectrum of things. How there's even more to it that I don't even know.
That's the thing. There's so much that I don't know.
It's not a doubting factor. It's more of I just don't know a lot of things. I don't know where Heaven is. Ya, we as people fabricated this idea that heaven is the sky, but if that was the case, wouldn't we see angels all the time, dancing around in their white robes, playing their harps? And even then, do we know if that's what angels do? I, personally, have a hard time believing that. My father, as well as my mother, were not lazy people.
(Plus, none of the four of them know how to play the harp...)
The point of the matter is, I DON'T KNOW. I don't know EXACTLY where Heaven is, or what we do, or when we become resurrected, or yada yada yada.
I do, however, have faith. That those kinds of things exist and those kinds of things happen.
I was reading my scriptures the other day, in Mark. (I tend to jump around.) And something caught my eye. It was Mark 6:6. This is what it said:
"And he (meaning Jesus, as he is trying to heal people,) marveled because of their unbelief. And he went around the villages, teaching."
Understanding that the verses before that were talking about how he couldn't do any miracles because no one had faith, I footnoted the word "unbelief." This is what it said: